Difficult Conversations are...Difficult

“Learning that you can’t control the other person’s reaction, and that it can be destructive to try, can be incredibly liberating. It not only gives the other person the space to react however they need to, but also takes a huge amount of pressure off you. You will learn things about yourself based on their reaction, but if you are prepared to learn, you’ll feel free from the desperate need for their reaction to go one certain way.” Douglas Stone

Difficult conversations are for me... simply difficult. Along with conflict and conflict resolution, those areas have been some of my biggest lessons on the journey. I believe that the challenge of facing difficult conversations and conflict stems from my wanting to be liked and keeping the peace at all cost. What I have learnt is ignoring and denying creates more conflict and less peace in the long run. And, this is the clincher, not everyone is going to like, agree, or delight in what is happening, what decisions you make and how it unfolds.

What I have learnt in having difficult conversations and conflict resolution:

1. Make it an intention to be kind

2. Listen - with an open mind - let the other person feel heard and understood.

3. Lose the need to be in control - to convince the other person of your way

4. Be honest and authentic

5. Have respect first for self and then for the other person

6. State your boundaries to yourself and act on them

7. Remind yourself there is no perfect way.

8. Practice. Practice. Practice

Peace and Blessings